So many of us grew up without the opportunity to become the person we want to be. Whether our homes were filled with trauma or addictions or those who raised us were just missing the essential executive function skills to be able to pass them on to us, we didn’t get them. And so, it goes. Generation after generation of kids are growing up with under-developed executive function skills; the very life skills that are necessary for successful “adulting.”
Some of you believe it’s too late for you to develop these skills or that it will take too long. The fact is, it’s never too late and in our 7-month journey together you will make significant changes – from the inside out - that will change your life. To me, that’s a relatively short period of time considering the lifetime many of us have spent without these skills and the difference that having them makes.
There's a lot of trauma that occurs as a result of not knowing what the source of our challenges are. And so many mixed feelings when and if we get diagnosed, everything from a huge sense of relief, and having an explanation for entire life experiences, to a deep sadness over the missed opportunities. And what could have been had we known sooner?
And what if the bigger issue with all the problems that we adults with or without ADHD have is because of the not knowing the lack of a diagnosis and all the trauma that results from living with the unknown, or the unnamed explanation?
Developing your Executive Function Skills and shifting your limiting beliefs is the fastest and most...
Forgiveness is a gift. We can give this gift at any time - to ourselves or to others. It’s our “get out of jail” gift card – releasing each of us from a prison of our own making. When we refuse to forgive, and choose to hold onto mistakes and use them against ourselves or others, we are setting ourselves up for a miserable life. How many times do we need to relive the pain of the past before we’ve experienced enough pain or misery?
To forgive is to stop feeling angry or resentful toward ourselves or to others for a mistake or harm caused. To forgive doesn’t mean I forget or condone; it simply means that I stop poisoning myself with my past mistakes or the harms done to me by others. And, as I said in the previous episode, “for things to change, you have to change.” I had to learn how to forgive, let go and move on. You also have to learn how to forgive, let go and move on. If not,...
Jim Rohn said - "For things to change, you have to change."
It seems very obvious when you think about it, for things to change, you have to change. I've been thinking about this quote a lot lately. And it's taken on a much deeper meaning for me, because he didn't say, for things to change, you have to change things. What he said is for things to change, you have to change. I understand now that means that I have to change in whatever ways are necessary for things to change for me, whatever those things are; and if I don't change, which is an inside job, then things in the outside world are not going to change for me. So, for things to change, you have to change.
Developing your Executive...
Feeling overwhelmed isn’t automatically a positive or a negative experience; it depends on the emotion and on the meaning you give to the emotion you’re feeling. You could be overwhelmed with gratitude and self-love or overwhelmed with grief and shame.
The meaning I give overwhelmed is that it implies “too much” or “more than someone can comfortably handle.” Is that you?
Every time I imagine what life is like WITHOUT well-developed executive function skills before the pandemic, and then imagine it during this pandemic, the impact just 10x’d itself in terms of the negative overwhelm and impact that it is having on your lives. And so many of you are telling me exactly that.
The good news?
Executive Function skills can be learned, no matter what age you are. No matter where you are located in the world. All it takes is the right training, strategies and support.
Being an Achiever isn’t just about developing your EF Skills; you also need to become the person who is the Achiever, instead of thinking of yourself as the person who is the ADDer. Saying “I am an Achiever” is the first step to taking on an empowering new Identity, just as saying “I am an ADDer, is a step that reinforces keeping the same old disempowering Identity.
Are you telling yourself stories or reliving your past failed attempts and making that your reality today? You’re probably not doing this consciously, however, many of us base our current reality on possibilities of what you’ve done in the past. Statements like, “this is just how I am” or “this doesn’t feel like me” or “I can’t see myself living that way” are common.
The good news?
Executive Function skills can be learned, no matter what age you are. No matter where you are...
According to government stats, last updated in 2018, there are a lot of unhappy people that are suffering in the world. In the U.S. alone:
And, according to Forbes magazine, the Self-Help industry generates over $11 billion annually. What I find interesting is that many of the self-help books and videos that get purchased sit on the shelf collecting dust. So for today’s podcast, I wanted to explore this phenomenon and help you get curious about what does work and why. How much time do we have? Not much. So let’s get to it.
HAPPENING FOR A LIMITED TIME! ADDventures in Achievement Foundational Skills program is open for enrollment until July 2, 2020.
Enrollment is closed now. If you want to gain control of your life, click HERE for more information and to get on the Waitlist for January 2021. ...
I have something a little different for you today. In case you missed listening to my interview with Meredith for Real: The Curious Introvert, she was kind enough to share the episode with me, so I could share it with you all directly. I love responding to questions and thoroughly enjoyed my interview with Meredith.
If my podcast show is the first time you’ve been hearing about the difference between ADHD and executive function skills, you're not alone. If you’re an adult who received a diagnosis of adult ADHD, executive function skills should also have been assessed and discussed with you, in my humble opinion. The odds of having under-developed executive function skills along with ADHD are very high; in fact, almost a given that you will. It's also highly probable that you will have under-developed executive function skills if you've lived with chronic depression, chronic anxiety, trauma, addictions, or chronic...
I love responding to questions and enjoyed being interviewed by Meredith for Real so much that I decided to change the format of my show to focusing on a topic and responding to questions about it. So, if you have a topic you’d like me to talk about and half a dozen questions you’d like answered on that topic, submit your topic and 6 questions to me directly at: https://www.drbarbaracohen.com/ask-dr-b
If my podcast show is the first time you’ve been hearing about executive function skills and strategies, you are not alone. If you’re an adult who received a diagnosis of adult ADHD, executive function skills should also have been assessed and discussed with you, in my humble opinion. The odds of having executive function deficits along with ADHD are very high; in fact, almost a given that you will.
Today’s episode is about the executive function skill of Initiating and some strategies to get you started on developing this...
For those of you who don’t know me yet …
Albert Einstein is quoted as saying, “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
That was me; living the majority of my academic life believing I was stupid, and chasing degrees to prove I wasn’t. The degrees never resolved the feelings; only accepting the truth did. I was smart; just differently. I wasn’t broken. I didn’t need fixing. I needed to understand what was great about me and build on that. I have, and so can you!
The meanings you give the events of your life is so important. They can either empower or destroy you.
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